Turkey Time is Coming!

Whether you are vegan, vegetarian, or any other “-arian,” the holidays are on us. Did you know that Wikipedia lists over 20 between November 1 and December 31? (Not that Wikipedia is all-inclusive, mind you!)

Here’s the challenge--and you face it as an individual as well as someone who may well be around or working with trauma survivors. Every single holiday, whether it’s yours or someone else’s, is like a lit firecracker with a slightly damp fuse. Family dynamics, things we didn’t or did get, that happened this way or that--all bring up the pain of victimization, and loss that have simmered, maybe morphed, or… not.

And they’re all old memories, those hard ones. Even the good ones are just that: shadow images from the past. But they are, in fact, like hungry creatures. Whichever one you feed grows. Whichever one you fear grows.

I have spent years working to feed the one I want and learning to have compassion for the one I’d like to see less of. I need, as does everyone, reminders of what is fear-producing to help me avoid it, and I don’t need torturous times. It’s a practice that has no room for hate. I don’t want that to grow.

Now is a time more than ever to strengthen yourself, to armor up with good memories, and to practice (literally) strategies that make surviving the holidays easier. Now, not next week. Use the mirror, borrow a friend, role play, and make choices now that will pay off then.