Toxic workplaces? Toxic people? What’s the toxicity?

Sometimes we’ll never know what makes workplaces toxic. Many times? It’s fear. Fear of loss is a powerful driver, whether it’s fear of loss of face or favor. When you look at the world of work with the sudden shifts we’re seeing, it’s easy to see where fear can run the show!

Nasty people? Yeah, we’re everywhere. We’re all wound pretty tightly these days, and the lower our emotional intelligence (and the higher the impact of trauma in our lives), the less civility we have to offer and the easier it is to find ourselves with our claws out. Of course, you have to have the skills--which include self-awareness and self-regulation (or “Elastic Emotions”) to soothe your inner beast and to stand in the face of the inner beasts at work while you decide what to do.

What happens when the workplace uglies start? Maybe that manager or leader is having a tough time and bares their fang and hisses, tossing their power around like hot coals in a dry pine building. The best response is symbolic: tossing cooling civility like water on those flying coals. Who’s it about anyway? Them or you?